I made a post on my Keeping the Dream blog, and I want to address it here more specifically here, because it goes to image and how we see ourselves, and image is inextricably tied up in relational aggression.
Being a “girl” is, often, used as an insult. “You throw like a girl.” “You run like a girl.” “You act like a girl.” To which you’re supposed to reply, “I do not!” What kind of statement does that make to you?
When did being a girl become such a crime?…okay, from way back. It’s deeply imbedded in patriarchal cultures, despite “separate but equal” protestations.
The fact is, we are often made to feel apologetic for being what we are. Is it any wonder we go from feeling apologetic for not being good enough as a human being to feeling apologetic for not being good enough for what we perceive as desirable or necessary for a female – not being skinny enough, bossomy enough, pretty enough, popular enough and so on?
We need to take back our power, stop and assess just how do we see ourselves, and be mindful of the many subtle and not so subtle ways we undermine ourselves…and let others undermine us.
Don’t apologize for who you are or what you are. And don’t let anyone use what defines you as a person against you. Our actions can be judged. Not what defines us as humans.
Demian,
~DreamSinger
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