I loved my mom, and was very protective of her, but our relationship was, also, filled with ambivalence.
My family dynamics were pretty wacked, because all the siblings suffered from various forms of childhood abuse. Suffice to say, I didn’t have a whole lot of good role models.
What I did have though were the books and stories I devoured about women, strong courageous women, Elizabeth Blackwell, the first woman doctor; stories of Florence Nightengale, Madame Curie, and then later stories of women who were abolitionists and suffragettes.
They gave me hope, a sense of pride in my gender, and also gave me a sense of connection and sisterhood among women.
And then there was my very best friend in 5th grade, I think. She and I remained best friends until we moved…and then since my mom didn’ t like her, she forbade me to write or keep in contact. I still grieve that loss to this day.
Anyway, I was just thinking about what a tremendous influence we can have on others…even if our influence is only through stories or someone’s memory.
Sometimes the answer to a problem, whether relational aggression or something else, isn’t necessarily tackling a situation as much as simply living an authentic life. Being, fully and authentically, can be the answer or alternative someone is looking for.
Demian,
~DreamSinger
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