No! It is a big deal.
If you are or have been a target of relational aggression, I want you to know you are not being “too sensitive” or somehow failing yourself for “letting” other people get to you. When it rains, you get wet. When people are mean, it hurts. It’s not your shortcoming for feeling that hurt.
Whether your experience with relational aggression is dealing with darting glances and muffled laughter in school or finding your reputation and standing among peers damaged at work, relational aggression hurts.
Be comfortable accepting that. Denial of negative or unpleastant emotions is one of the root causes of relational aggression.
Own your feelings and know there are choices you can make. You do have options, and there are a number of good resources that can help you on this. Relational aggression is no longer an unnamed phenomenon many of us have to struggle through alone, as we used to.
The bottom line is, know that when you feel stress, anxiety, hurt or anger, you are not making a big deal out of it.
It already is.
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2 comments in " Am I Making a Big Deal Out of This? "
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Follow-up comment rss or Leave a Trackback.Boy, am I glad I found this site! I wish more people knew about this site and were more informed about relational aggression. Unfortunately, RA isn’t recognized or discussed openly. People, especially women, are reluctant to admit it exists.I feel many women are hesitant to speak up, even when they know it’s happening to them or a friend/loved one. Perhaps they remain silent because they still hope to gain acceptance/admission into a clique themselves.>sigh
Hi, beenthereb4, and welcome to my blog! I do understand what you mean. I think there’s a number of reasons it’s hard to speak up.
Part of it might be that we just accept that’s the way things are. Another part, is fear, not wanting to become the next target or, as you said, they “hope to gain acceptance/admission into a clique themselves.”
You know, I invite you to comment on some of the more recent posts, as unfortunately, blogs don’t work like message boards. New comments won’t bump the post up to the top so others can benefit from your insights.
I’m still working on this blog, so hope to set things up so I won’t have to approve comments (to combat spam), otherwise we’ll be subjected to a long litany of attempts to appeal to our gambling weaknesses and opportunities to extend, expand and enlargen certain parts of our anatomy! *sigh*
Again, welcome
Demian,
~DreamSinger